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I just ran across writer Steven Pressfield‘s blog, and I’m glad I did. It’s interesting and at times, hilarious. One post in particular hits home; on the subject of loving a writer, Pressfield writes:

“Are you in love with a writer? Are you sure about this? Sure you don’t want to try someone easier on your heart, like a bull rider, a Black Ops commando or a motorcycle stuntman?

Jack Kerouac. He’s cute, but …

Herewith, from painful experience, a few guidelines for those who have given their hearts to servants of the literary Muse. (The following observations apply equally, of course, to actors, artists, musicians, comedians, entrepreneurs and all others of this particularly unruly stripe[here, I add: academics. In fact, academic/artsy/writer folks like me might be the most egregious of the bunch]. Please, lovers, keep the following in mind:

1) Writers are not normal.

E.L. Doctorow calls writing “a socially acceptable form of schizophrenia.” What he means is that artists and entrepreneurs are a little crazy. They hear music that the rest of us don’t. And sometimes the pursuit of that music carries them apart from their kinder, gentler selves. We must exercise great patience when we love artists. They are driven by forces that they don’t understand and cannot control.

2) Writers live in their heads.

What is fun to normal people—sky-diving, say; a weekend in Aruba—means nothing to your writer. Her fun is in her head. An epic is playing on the big screen and she is taking dictation as fast and furiously as she can.  “When I work, I relax,” said Picasso. “Doing nothing … makes me tired.”

[.....] (What, did you think I was just going to cut and paste all his hard work here? Go read his blog for the missing bits!)

3) Writers are not governed by reason.

We imagine that artists and entrepreneurs are smart, even brilliant. But in truth they are operating on instinct and raw nerve [...]  “Every time I face that yellow pad,” Maya Angelou said, “I think, ‘Uh oh, they’re going to find me out now.’”

[...]

4) Writers are primitive.

[....]

Artists and entrepreneurs require adult supervision. No matter how eloquently they put forward their case, underneath they are struggling, like you, to find and keep their emotional footing. They are insecure, grandiose, jealous, charming, fickle, romantic.

Are you an artist? Then cut your mate some slack. It’s no day at the beach, loving you. You’re a handful, baby.

Try to visit Planet Earth as frequently as possible and, when you do, camp out for a while. Really stay. Really listen. Remember that your g.f./b.f./spouse is struggling with the fact that you’re serving the Muse. Your mate worries that s/he’s #2 in your heart. Reassure her(him). A little sex, flowers, champagne go a long way.”

There’s more, and you should go over to his blog and read the whole post – but that’s enough to show you that the guy has clearly got a lot of insight on this matter. He’s pretty much described the scene here at Casa Chaos for the past two weeks. I am sure DH is more than ready for my chapter to be done and turned in! After that…well, I guess I’ll give him a few days before I re – launch myself into the novel with a burning vengeance…! The paintings, though, have to be finished sooner rather than later.